Just to follow up on a few points raised from my previous blog post. Life isn’t always about doing what we want, it’s also about restrictions.

Sometimes we have to do things we don’t want, because they are good for us. Sometimes we don’t get to do things we want, because they are bad for us.

That’s just part of life, and for our horses, we make those decisions. But we do need some knowledge and understanding to know what is good or bad for the horses, and how to weigh the physical health benefits or costs against the mental health benefits or costs.

What is good for the body may not always be good for the mind, and vice versa. We have to be prepared to compromise.

Sometimes the advice from the vet or CAB may be required to help you find the best balance for that individual horse. That’s where the team approach is of most benefit, when professionals work together to discuss and pool knowledge so that the outcome is best in terms of welfare and ‘a good life’ for the individual horse.

But we shouldn’t have to be made to do something that we don’t like, that causes us stress or discomfort, and has no real benefit for us, just because someone else wants us to do it. Okay, we might choose to do something for a loved one that we’re not mad about, for example watch a film we find a bit boring, or go to a work dinner with people we aren’t so keen on, but we do have a degree of choice there, especially if we are doing it through love. But we shouldn’t be expected or forced to do something, through fear, that we really aren’t comfortable with or find stressful: that isn’t an example of a healthy relationship, and in this day and age with increasing awareness of the dangers of coercive control we should recognise where the boundaries lie.

By the same token when we look at our interactions with our horses, we need to be aware that yes, if they have a good relationship with us, they may choose to do things they aren’t quite so in to, but if they are doing activities that they don’t enjoy, or find stressful, just because they are scared to say no, that really isn’t a healthy relationship.

How do we know if the horse is complying/ conforming because they are scared not to, or because they’ve learned they have no choice?

We need to get better at reading body language and behaviour, better at understanding motivation, learning and emotion. When we have this knowledge and understanding, we can observe and assess an individual horse, and recognise how they are feeling about the activity in question. We can look for indicators of stress and discomfort, or signs that they have shut down or are in a depressed state, or simply have become compliant and a little switched off.

If this is something you would like to learn more about, you may be interested in some of the courses that I run. I’ll have a series of new courses launching this year that will cover these areas, as well as the courses I already have. To be kept to date with these as they launch, sign up for my mailing list at

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Thank you!!